


The Grandest Adventures in the Land

by runningondreams



Category: Marvel (Comics), Marvel 616
Genre: (observed), Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Fluff, Kissing, M/M, medieval-esque
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-19
Updated: 2019-01-19
Packaged: 2019-10-12 12:48:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17467865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/runningondreams/pseuds/runningondreams
Summary: Doreen has a plan. A plan to JOIN THE AVENGERS.





	The Grandest Adventures in the Land

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MassiveSpaceWren](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MassiveSpaceWren/gifts).



> Written for Massivespacewren, who requested a medieval-esque fantasy AU (with a side of possibly secret relationship) in the 2018 Fandom_Stocking event. I hope it's as fun to read as it was to write!
> 
> * * *

Doreen has a plan. A plan to JOIN THE AVENGERS.

 _But Doreen, you don’t need the Avengers_ , Tippy-toe points out, which is obviously true. Doreen has squirrel powers, which are clearly the best sort of powers, and she can do plenty of awesome things all on her own, or at least, with the help of her squirrel friends and human friends who have no particular special powers of any sort beyond being awesome people. 

But, as she explains to Tippy-toe on her way through the forest to the Avenger’s camp, it’s entirely possible that the Avengers need _her_. They do all sorts of fighting, against giants sometimes, and evil wizards with bad facial hair, and lich lords and invading hordes of dead kings, although that was only that one time and possibly it will never happen again. The point was, they went around making sure small villages and towns were safe from really big threats, even bigger than that time fairies were stealing all the acorns in Jersey forest, and they were pretty much _the_ most famous adventuring band in the realm. People like that could probably use some squirrel powers in their party. 

When she finds the camp--easily identifiable by the smell of woodsmoke and lots of metal--there are more than a few interested squirrels who have come along to watch. There are a lot people in the clearing, all of them wearing colorful cloaks or pretty dyed-leather armor. There’s Hawkeye, the rogue acrobat, and the Scarlet Witch, who’s actually a sorceress, and Warbird, the legendary swordmage. Wasp and She-Hulk are setting up tents. Doreen can see that extra height would probably be very useful in that process if you didn’t have squirrel help.

 _Who are you looking for?_ Tippy-toe asks.

Doreen tries to explain in a way her squirrel friends might understand. There’s Captain Rogers, the Paladin of Freedom, who has hair so light it’s almost white, like the ice he’d been frozen in, and who always carries a wide round shield that returns to him no matter where he throws it. And there’s the Iron Man, the artificer, who might be wearing a shiny knight’s helmet with his magical armor, or might have his face bared. Good teeth, questionable facial hair. They were the leaders. If she can convince them, the rest of the team will take her on no problem.

 _Are you sure this Iron Man’s not an evil wizard?_ Tippy-toes asks.

 _I’m sure_ , Doreen insists. _He’s a wizard, but not an evil one_. _I think the facial hair is required for the job_.

It doesn’t take long for the squirrels to find them; they certainly know the forest a lot better than the Avengers do, and once they _have_ found them, it doesn’t take long for Doreen to follow.

Captain Rogers and the Iron Man are swimming in a little pool where the stream widens out. Iron Man’s goatee doesn’t look anything like an evil wizard’s, Doreen is glad to note. She’ll have to figure out a good way to explain the difference. Their armor and the famous shield are securely stashed in a ward circle on the streambank. They’d been fighting an earth elemental, Doreen remembers. Over in the quarry, so they’d probably gotten pretty dusty. They’ll be more relaxed if they get to wash before she presents her case. 

She settles into wait and tries to think of how she wants to phrase this. _Hi, I’m Squirrel Girl, and I thought you could use some help?_ No. Honesty was good, but she’s been told she can be too honest. People don’t like to be told what they need. _Hi, I want to join?_ Maybe. It was short and simple, at least. _Hi, I’m Squirrel Girl, welcome to my forest?_ Might be mistaken for a threat. It had happened before. Hmmmmm. She stared at the two of them, trying to decipher what approach might work best for their specific personalities.

Iron Man is running his hand through Captain Rogers’ hair, smiling and showing off his very good teeth. That was grooming behavior, in squirrels, and she’d seen humans do it too. It meant they were close, like siblings. All the ballads agreed. Brothers in arms of the highest caliber and the strongest bond. So maybe if she could convince _one_ of them that might be enough. And then Captain Rogers put his _face_ on Iron Man’s face, which was more of a ground-squirrel thing--

Oh. _Oh_. 

That wasn’t how humans worked, was it. The ballads definitely hadn’t mentioned kissing. Doreen thinks they probably should have. Maybe the bards didn’t know. Maybe it was supposed to be secret. 

She turns her back on what looks to be an increasingly private moment. 

_What’s wrong?_ Tippy-toe asks.

 _I think we should go talk to Wasp or Warbird instead_ , Doreen tells her. If it’s secret, they probably won’t be very receptive to seeing her step out of the forest whenever they’re done. And if it’s _not_ secret it would probably still be weird. Humans were weird like that. 

Yeah. She leaps away, back towards the camp. Definitely better to talk to Wasp, even if wasps were annoying sometimes. And she seemed nice. Warbird was maybe a bit too much like an eagle to be a good first contact. Or maybe She-Hulk would be good. She-Hulk was green, which was a good color.They could have a strength contest. Instant bonding moment. Perfect.

Operation: JOIN THE AVENGERS PART 2 was underway. 


End file.
